Nintendo Counters Palworld - Adds Weapons To Pokemon & Partners With NRA

Since Palworld's early access release, the gaming world has eagerly awaited Nintendo's reply to the controversial title, as its colourful yet violent 'Pals' share a striking resemblance to those of Nintendo's infamous family friendly Pokemon franchise. We now have that response.

The Super Mario Bros. Movie Rated R18+

Nintendo's highly anticipated Super Mario Bros. feature length animated film has received a restrictive R rating by the Motion Picture Association of America.

Miss-Take: Nintendo Slit

Cultural miss-understanding can't be blamed for the near miss. Reggie Fils-Aime thought the name was great.

New Pokemon Scarlet/Violet Starter Turdtwig Revealed

GameFreak has revealed a special promotional fourth starter Pokemon for their recently announced Scarlet/Violet generation releasing Holiday 2022.

Steam Deck What? Nintendo Confidently Responds To Valve

 

Nintendo has sensationally returned serve to Valve's upcoming competing product, the 'Steam Deck' by unveiling a suite of new additions to their system.

Metroid Dread Coming Oct. 8 2021

You'd print this as a magazine spread if it were 2001, wouldn't ya Ninty? Hire fans lol.

 

 

Nintendo Apologises For Switch Online With More Titles

 

Nintendo has responded to scrutiny regarding their subpar Switch Online update by announcing another 6 titles which the company assures is 'nothing but BANGERS'.

Miss-Take: A Link To The Past

We'll wait...

Microsoft Acquires Sony & Nintendo For 1 Trillion USD

Not content with their behemoth US$7.5 Billion acquisition of Bethesda, Microsoft has decided to impulse purchase both Sony and Nintendo, effectively ending the video game console wars that has plagued the earth since the 1970's.

Korok Seeds Officially More Addictive Than Crack

 
A conclusive study by the World Health Organization has found that Korok seeds from The Legend Of Zelda: Breath Of The Wild are more addictive than Crack Cocaine.

Shovel Knight's Shovel Just A Giant Coke Spoon

 
Reports on the surprising disappearance of Shovel Knight from all store fronts reveal that the protagonist's shovel is actually a giant cocaine spoon.

Retro Games That Somehow Utilise Ray Tracing

Many video game outlets are incorrectly reporting that the upcoming Crysis Remastered will include ray tracing on its Switch Port. Seeing how the hardware is incapable of utilising the technique, we've gone down memory lane to chronicle some classic retro games that also manage to pull off the impossible.

Princess Peach's Hidden Dildo Found In Luigi's Mansion 3

Next Level Games have congratulated the zealous players who found Peach's favourite phallic shaped stimulator hidden inside hotel room 501.

Mewthree Announced For Pokemon Sword/Shield

Nintendo has sensationally announced that a new evolution of a fan favourite will be included in the latest Pokemon titles hitting the Nintendo Switch this year.

Smash Bros. Ultimate Tier Mode Revealed

 
A new mode for players within the top percentile of Smash Ultimate's Global Smash Power rankings have been revealed. The regulations will not shock you in the slightest.

Crypt Of The NecroDancer (Switch) Breaks Sales Record

Despite only releasing on Nintendo Switch yesterday, 2015's beloved Indie classic Crypt Of The NecroDancer has sold an astonishing 5 billion digital copies on launch day. The sheer amount of units sold not only breaks records on Nintendo platforms, but also the previous best selling game of all time - Tetris - by an astonishing 4.8 Billion sales! Although an anomaly, the unprecedented numbers could have a valid explanation.

Nintendo Announces 'Nintendo Garbo'

Not satisfied with their already jam-packed announcement period over the past week - which included a 'Mini Direct' and the reveal of the eccentric 'Labo' creators set, Nintendo has continued their unprecedented momentum and today unveiled 'Garbo' - an iteration of Labo for the lower socioeconomic demographic.

Incredible Mario Kart 8 Deluxe DLC Characters Announced!!!

Nintendo has revealed that 4 brand new characters will be arriving to Mario Kart 8 Deluxe through paid DLC later this month.

Super Mario All Stars 2 For Nintendo Switch

 
4 of the greatest 3D platformers of all time, packaged together and remastered into breathtaking 1080P/60FPS! An abundance of online components take advantage of the Nintendo Switch's online infrastructure which allow for unprecedented features and gameplay not yet seen in a mainline Mario Title. This is true Nintendo fanboy's (FanBOY? That's sexist!) wet dream.


Hype yourself up and prepare to witness the box art in all of its glory:

Luigi's Apartment for Nintendo Switch

When Luigi finds himself stuck in his inherited, haunted apartment over night, he finds there's not much to do. With just his trusty Poltergust 6900 in his possession, there's really only one thing on Luigi's mind... Clean up the mess! 'Cuming' to the Nintendo Switch in 2018.

Full Box Art after the jump.