After deeming violent video games as the most dangerous weapon on the planet AND the sole reason behind America's mass shootings, Walmart are now liquidating their redundant stock of violent games by giving away free copies with a purchase of any fire-arm.
Walmart has come under fire from regular people with at least half a brain cell after the supermarket conglomerate originally banned sales of violent video games through a ridiculous clutch decision used as a distraction to shield calls for gun control thanks to an influx of mass shootings.
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| Look at this psychopathic, mentally deranged freak! |
The liquidation of Walmart's violent video game stock is no surprise after the hasty decision handed down by their corporate executives. However, the free pairing of such games in conjunction with a purchase of dangerous fire-arms (which are currently at the forefront of stern social debate) has been heavily criticised.
Walmart's CEO Doug McMillon has defended the company's decision.
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"It's pretty obvious that the NRA has infiltrated Walmart's executive ranks thanks to their large capital investments over the years so what did you expect us to do?"
"Video games — as exemplified in the court cases of the 1990's — have always been an easy scapegoat. As the years have passed the video game industry has also pushed away from retail to digital storefronts, so I have no problem hanging those pricks out to dry. Weak revenue talks bitches!"
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| "Mentally deranged? No problem!" |
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| "Browsing through this section? You're mentally deranged!" |
"In regards to liquidating our stock of violent games with fire-arms, everyone already knows that we're shielding games in front of the obvious fact that guns are dangerous and need to be properly regulated for the safety of others. We still need to clear our inventory though. What better time to do that than while everyone (except the redneck hicks) are still pissed at our continued sale of guns? They're still going to be furious anyway, so why not rub salt into the wounds and liquidate the games that way as well?"
"It's the ultimate show of arrogance. Is that not the American way?"
Era Error reached out to the NRA to clarify their involvement with Walmart's insane decision to ban violent games while continuing to sell fire-arms.
"They do what we tell them to do, just like everyone else in the United States." — NRA Spokesperson.
"Now listen here. If any of you fuckwits at Era Error are dumb enough to post an article on this or Walmart's response, do not step foot in the United States ever again. Otherwise your fate will be decided with an unfortunate accident by an estranged gunman who purchased his gun at Walmart thanks to our free violent video game deal. Those video games are so disgusting."
No worries NRA, we have no plans to step foot in the States for a long time.
EDIT: Probably should've checked if any of our Interns had crossed the border first before posting.
If you're a budding, young person with a keen interest in video games and a desire to work in journalism within the industry, please send your resume to Era Error. We have a new position available.
