Konami Announces Castlevania N64 Port

Konami has announced a re-release of the much maligned Castlevania: Legacy of Darkness for current generation platforms. This will be no simple port.

The Castlevania series (like many others) suffered immensely in its first foray into 3D on Nintendo's 64-bit system, as developers learnt to grasp the unprecedented capabilities of modern machines during the 1990's. Contrarily, the franchise sleepily flourished on CD based consoles, largely due to retaining the traditional 2D style the series was re-known for.

Konami recently re-released ports of those beloved CD entries (Rondo Of Blood & Symphony Of The Night) to the delight of fans, but no one was expecting - or asking - for the announcement Konami made via their Facebook page this morning.

"Konami Digital Entertainment Inc.
Micro-Transaction Way, Pachinko

It's a bittersweet, Symphony of the niiiiight. No wait, it's...

Konami hears the constant cries of gamers on its social channels. We normally ignore them because we don't give a fuck about what you want as long as idiots continue to buy our products despite our utter contempt towards gaming. Strangely the holiday season has softened our stance, so we're going to give you all something that you didn't know you wanted.

After the fantastic reception towards our incredibly advanced and complicated ports within Castlevania: Requiem, we felt it was appropriate to follow up with the vastly superior N64 experience.

Sure, laugh now, but no-one understands that Legacy of Darkness is actually the superior game from the generation. Don't believe us? Check out the User Metacritic score:

On its release, critics praised Konami's efforts in bringing the predominantly 2d franchise into the wondrous world of 3d. Unfortunately somewhere down the line, people decided to hate on the game for no reason and gave it the horrible reputation it unfairly suffers from today.

Modern day gamers love Dark Souls for its challenge. Legacy of Darkness is that game's Dad - an abusive father that beat the living shit out of it's child. A real hard ass that doesn't fuck around and will antagonize anyone willing to go toe to toe with it.

Our Marketing team endured 5 seconds of the game to take this screenshot.

Can you handle disgracefully fucking shit controls and gameplay, a camera that doesn't work, barely legible graphics, incoherent level design, frustrating enemies and a pathetic save system? This game was ancient when it released in 1999 and it's aged like your grandma who smoked multiple packs of cigarettes a day, but that's a part of the charm.

This is no simple port either. Converting the N64 engine to current generation platforms was almost impossible and our developers had a hell of a time. Therefore expect to see minimal effort, with a shitload of bugs and glitches that couldn't be ironed out. Don't worry though, it just adds to the infuriating challenge that you're up against!

Dark Souls-like difficulty? Be careful what you wish for.

If you're a psychotic fuck that likes to torture themselves as leisure, Castlevania: Legacy of Darkness launches digitally this month on PS4, Xbox One, Switch, PC for $90USD."

Our recollections of the N64 Castlevania games were not fond. We remember a blurry, disorienting mess that didn't warrant the effort of completion when we first played it at the dawn of the millennium. We were probably just a bunch of dumb-ass kids though. Konami seems like a kind hearted company that always plays to gamers interests, so we're going to give them the benefit of the doubt and dive deep on this one.