Sexist Gaming Site Shocked That Another Gaming Site Also Sexist


An online video game community who constantly ridicules the participation of females in their favourite hobby is suddenly shocked and disgusted by another eerily similar community while it is very publicly lambasted by media outlets for doing the exact same thing.

The mass vitriol came to light as soon as the (once) much respected video game site NeoGAF came under seige. This was after several allegations of sexual misconduct towards its owner Tyler Malka, which were lodged by a young woman who was once his acquaintance and decided to share her experiences on social media.

" I just don't understand how someone could grope a woman in real life and think they can get away with it!" Says Jordie Alexander aka "ChickMagnet_69" - Owner of rival online community site Virtual Vindicator.

" I want to make this statement absolutely clear on behalf of the Virtual Vindicator community that we have absolutely nothing against women outside the confines of a computer screen. We stand by any feminist group equally to condemn the horrid and atrocious accused acts of NEOGAF's owner Tyler Malka. None of our members on the Virtual Vindicator site would ever commit misconduct towards a woman in real life. We find those acts are only acceptable in the weird virtual world that we live in because we are too fucked up to exist properly in the real one!




I mean come on people, we all know that women are fucking shit at video games - and I mean all of them! It's a fact of life that can't be denied. It's in their genetic code to suck. Males feel that because of this proven fact which is backed up by several statistics that we are well within our rights to be sexist and abusive towards women in all online video game portals. They're just inferior people on the platform. It's going to take women at least 60 years to pick up the pace of their hand eye co-ordination and useless knowledge of fantasy lore to catch up to us beastly Men. It's like living in the 1950's while playing online video games. Women are absolutely useless and as a superior male I can say and do whatever I like. I quite often give women snarky comments like 'get back in the kitchen!' or 'Go and make me a sandwich!' because I'm so fucking hilarious! The other loser, dateless virgins I play with online think I'm the wittiest gentleman on the interwebz!!

Another proven fact is that all females playing video games online with voice chat enabled want to fuck anyone they encounter on match-making, so I always ensure I command them to join me in a HABBO hotel room to have virtual sex. For some reason I always get a disconnection at that point but I've followed up with my internet service provider to have the situation rectified in the future. Again I want to reiterate that it's totally ok to proposition and harass women online because its not real and doesn't count. Not like that dirty NEOGAF owner who's been accused of unconsummated sexual acts which is seriously fucked up. He should've just sent random girls playing in online servers some dick pics like we do as that's absolutely ok and not sexual abuse in any shape or form. What a stupid cunt!"








We asked Jordie Alexander to reveal these obviously incorrect "proven facts" about women with legitimate statistics to which he unsurprisingly declined. We here at Era Error could not let such an un-substantiated claim go without a challenge so we decided to invite Jordie to our offices to take on an anonymous gamer so he could test his skills at Overwatch in a 1vs1 match. Unfortunately for Jordie, with him being a stupid fuck and not able to put two and two together,  he didn't even consider that his opponent could possibly be a female, which was obviously the case here.

And of course, he was absolutely obliterated in all 5 matches which were completed. We felt it was fitting to reveal who the mystery gamer was after the embarrassing performance to rub some salt into Jordie's wounds and prove his conceptions wrong, so we turned down the pixelation filter that we had applied in the office.

Jordie's response after realising his defeat was to the hands of a female?
"She must have a dick!"

A lot of strange things happen at the Era Error offices. Usually things that are easy to Photoshop.


Disclaimer:
We here at Era Error do not condone sexual misconduct directed towards women in real life or in online platforms whatsoever. We felt it was necessary to point out the hypocrisy of many gamers after revelations and accusations of sexual assault came to light in the real world by members of the video game industry. It is horrible. However, many have publicly shamed the accused perpetrators despite acting disorderly and committing similar acts in online formats themselves. It is common to witness virtual and verbal harassment towards women while playing video games online and the common consensus is that it is perfectly acceptable. It isn't. There is no distinction between virtual and real worlds. Harassment is harassment. If you're going to speak against it, make sure you're setting the example.